She Deserves Rest
A poem about my final goodbye, with a patient who hasn't quite left yet.
A patient that I’ve known for 9 years came in for their routine appointment yesterday. I’ve seen her once a month for the whole time I’ve seen her. End stage Cancer had stripped away almost everything from her since the last time I had seen her; but her smile remained.
As I tested her eyes, I broke down. I sobbed.
I couldn’t hold it in. I didn’t want to hold it in.
It was good to feel and to cry — and as I sob again tonight whilst I write this, the grief is very real.
I wrote a poem about a similar experience two years ago.
there was a certain frailty about her as she creaked into my room that told me today would be the last i held her hand mid-procedure the last wrinkled squeeze of a warm hand, bone-cold part of me hopes i’m wrong but most of me hopes i’m right. she deserves rest. -S-2024
Love.